It felt normal and fun..

Hello there!

It’s November 16 to day and I don’t have any plans to do- yet. Mama woke me u early lately to look over the viand she’s cooking. I’m betting bored and I need to do something to ease this thing ugh!  Syempre hindi nako sanay ng ganito, pahinga pahinga lang! Id only I can go to the mall every single day of this suspension thingy, I would do so!

Yesterday I got there actually. I arrived around past 3pm and got myself a venti cup of Caffe’ Mocha, its not my usual but I just want to, for a change. I waited for David and he arrived around 4pm.

Yes, I am with Davis yesterday. We walked around the mall and talked random things. I don’t know why, all of a sudden we’re so comfortable with each other. What I mean is, date kasi parang ang awkward. Err, I suddenly realized that I am right all along. That the two of us are better off friends. We spent one hour at the videoke hub and sang random songs. And then again, I find it weird thou hindi ko alam kung bakit eh. There is this one song I made him sing, ‘All or Nothing’ by O-Town. While he sing, I was actually singing with him without a mic. Basta sinasabayan ko lang sya kasi feeling ko talaga ah, ayaw sakin ng Mic! Feeling ko sinasabotahe ako ng Mic sa mga videokehan eh. Going back, while singing, I realized that, that song is kinda fitting in in our past. I shrugged it of but It sends me into deep thoughts so I looked for it again in the song book and had it played again and this time, I am the one who sang it. Eh talagang swak samin! I mean sa past. Hindi ko lang alam kung napansin ba nya, pero kasi saming dalawa ako yung mas observant sa mga ganyang bagay noon or talagang masyado lang siguro akong conscious. We took a couple of photos as I requested and told him I will post them on my IG account. I even posted a video of us singing the song ‘when I was your man’ by Bruno Mars, together. Haha! How Ironic! We got to do things together na hindi naming ginawa dati when we are still together. And we enjoy doing things. Bat ganon?

I really, really never thought of this things will come. What I mean is, we didn’t end in a smooth way thou we actually did and doing it now slowly, the patching things up. We both are not good at verbal closure, given na iyon but somehow, nagagawa naman naming sya through chat kahit pakonti konti and I can say that we are good now. As I had said lately, we are more comfortable with each other than before. We’re like old friends that didn’t saw each other for a long time and so we are catching up things now. We  even talked about some sort of personal things like, having relationship with others thou we both don’t have one at the moment. He mentioned the girl he love and told me things about how he puts effort for her and such. Well, I have nothing felt against that kasi for me, doing things that would make your special someone happy is normal. Yes? And I find it weird whenever he will say, I do this and that for her that I didn’t do for you before. I mean, so what? I am not into those things naman. Ako naman kasi, kung hindi mo kayang gawin para sakin, okay lang. Lalo na kung hindi rin naman makakaabala or kung hindi naman talaga kailangan na kailangan. Hay nako sya, love sick sobra! We also talked about things na habang pinag-uusapan naming, ang nasa isip ko talaga ay, ‘why are we talking things like this anyway?’ At oo, pinag-uasapan talaga naming ang nakaraan naming! Like, seriously? Hahaha! But honestly speaking, I didn’t feel any weird feeling habang pinag-uusapan namin yon over our food. Parang normal lang na pag-usapan ung topic.

We really have this weird connection na siguro hindi na talaga mawawala kahit ano pang gawin naming iwas. That, pag kailangan ko sya, andyan sya. Though hindi naman nya kasi ako sinasabihan pag may mga dilemma sya sa buhay dahil may iba naman syang kaibigan. May kaibigan naman din ako, I have not that many but I have true friends, if you get what I mean. Pero kasi, I trust him with such things. Like when I feel stress or what or I have something in mind that I wanna talked about, alam kong masasabihan ko sya.

So, Engineer, thank you sa time! Pag-isipan mo yung plano ah, ang tagal kasi ng 5 years na maghihintay ka sa wala tyaka, alam mo naman diba? Nasabi ko na sayo kagabe. Haha! 

PS: thank you for not wearing your pabango. It meant a lot kasi nga sa allergies to sa mga bagay na scented.

-Niki 

Sus-pended 101

Hi! Its been what? Two or three months? Err.. I cant remember.

I’ll try to post more for the next 30 days and I promised that because I have nothing else to do for those said days as I am officially suspended from work starting today—err yesterday, November 13. It has something to do with the biggest ‘joke’ (mistake) I had done last September 20. ( Kung naaalala nyo pa.)

Question. Do I feel upset? Well of course but come to think of it, its just fine. Just like what I often say to people who are close tomewhen they have problems, Shit happens.

So later that afternoon, Sir J chat me saying,’wait for me at the conference’ and so I did. There he explaine to me whats and whys. Sa totoo lang, sa tatlong minutong meeting naming,yes you read it right. 3 minutes. Nakatingin lang ako ng deretcho sa mata nya and keep answering him, ‘yes sir’ and ‘okay sir’. I didn’t even asked anything or say something. Para saan pa ba? Eh nagdesisyon na din naman sila at ang magagawa ko lang naman ay making sa gusto nila at sumunod. So after that, I went back inside and gathered my things for effective immediately that day ang suspension ko. I will be back after a month (December 13) For the training. Again. The suspension had many more other ‘sanga’ but I didn’t mind at all. Money doesn’t measure my intelligence.

I will be missing my squad (#spg). Before I got home tonight I spend the night with them on a movie date. Hayyy.. nakakamiss naman talaga the girls. Now I know what Sepanx really feels.

Am I stress? Yes. And I think I need someone to talk about this too or maybe, someone to be with and wont ask me what happen. I am not a ‘paawa’ type of person. If something upsetting happened to me and you feel that I am really into being stress, all you have to do is join me walk around somewhere or just talk to me about other things kasi, kapag ready nako pag-usapan ang totoong problema, ako pa mismo yung mag oopen dun. I am such a cry baby. Hanggang hindi ako nakaka get over sa nangyari, iiyakan ko iyon whenever I got to remember it and I am not comfortable that people see me cry specially if you weren’t that close to me or I feel that you will just feel pitty for me. One of the things that I hate the most is being pitty-ed. Basta ayoko lang because I know to myself that I am okay, and if not, soon I will be. And I believe that whatever happens, it happened for a reason. And I don’t want to blame anyone for that.

To Ate Gen, Ate Jel, Danica, Jessabelles and Arra, thankyou for tonight. I really had fun! I will miss our funny convos in the middle of our duty. I appreciate everything we do together guys. You really made me happy today and everyday of course. I’ll see you in a month. Aldub you.

And to my Loves, Eunice, Juju, Clang, Karla and Carlhie, and Pepe, keep safe guys. Don’t worry I’ll be fine. You take care of yourselves. I love you guys..

PS: I know you will read this dahil hindi naman kita mablock ditto. Viber me asap. Nagpromise ka dib a? Na pwede kong ibuhos sayo yung galit ko kasi alam kong kilala mo ko?

-The suspended Niki

Torn between,..

Before my four days offs, I have so many plans on what would I be posting on this blog. Pero nakatatlong araw nako, walapa akong nagagawa! I am always torn between Blogging, Writing my story update on Watty and browsing my SMAs! Nakakainis pag, gusto mong kunin ang laptop kay Kuya pero tatamarin ka kasi nasa tabi mo lang si iPad at nang-iimbita si cellphone. >o<

I have this certain topic on my mind. But I am planning to do it nalang next day off ko which in on October 21 and 22. HAyyy… napaka tamad kong tao Lord!! As much as I want to post these random thoughts running inside my head, tinatamad ako,, huhuhu.. sorry.. A

-          -Niki

October 14th, 265 moths of me..

So, Hello there again!

Its October 16 today and ‘em on the third day of my four-days-off from work yay!! I decided to have this break for my birthday which is dated last Friday pa.

I don’t have that much for my birthday thought its one of the most memorable that I had since I don’t remember. Mama cooked for me, family and some relatives. I started my day at St.pio. I prayed and had some alone time there before I headed home here in Pampanga. My friends surprise me pa after naming mag out sa office. I was so shock that I literally cried because my heart did not stop beating na para bang inlove! Hahaha! Kidding aside, I was so touch for their efforts. I just feel bad that they have a friend like me whose not that consistent. What I mean is, I am really hard to handle sometimes. I easily get insecure, mad and such but still, I am thankful to have such friends like Eunice, Julie, Karla, Clarisse, Arra and Carlhie. And Oh! Don’t forget Pepe! Thank you Lord!!

Mama and Bok gave me gifts, and letters! Yay!! Before my birthday came, what I want to really receive is a letter. Though it may seems impossible dahil, napakakonting tao nalang yata ang nagbibigay ng cards ngayon at personalize letters. At iilan nalang ba ang tulad ko na lagi nagwi-wish na sana, may matanggap na letter sa birthday ko?

Here’s my Mama’s message for me :

Happy Birthday Nak!

Kahit lagi kang nagbubwisit saakin kapag umuuwi ka,love kita! Happy Birthday I love you! Wag kang mag-alala, mas love kita kesa sa ate mo.

-Mama

This is my first time to receive a letter from mama and I cried, again. Hehe. Im such a cry baby but that’s how I reacted talaga sa mga ganon! That letter was actually written in our native language in Pampanga which is Kapampangan. Trinanslate ko lang. 

I love you so much Mommy ko!! Kahit makulit ka, hindi kita pagpapalit kahit kanino.. 

PS: thank you Ninang Jazz for my favorite tuna carbonara.. 

-         - Niki the Birthday Girl

Comfort Song..

I had being listening to a particular song since last week. Ewan to ba, I find it so addicting. Hindi naman na ako nagtataka kasi random naman talaga ang choice ko sa music though I have a thing for OPMs. Para kasing, ang sarap magmahal eh, parang kahit matagal kang maghintay sa taong yon eh, nakapa worth it. Basta, this is my comfort song for now. I am listening to it as of the moment. Ako lang ba talaga ang ganito o meron pang ibang tao na kapag gusto ang isang kanta, paulit-ulit din pinapakinggan yung song? As in naka repeat sa mp3 para kapag tapos na, uulit sya mag-isa.? I am guilty on that. Old habits die hard. Hehe.. Here’s the song.. kayo na ang humusga! Basta ako, I fell inlove with it..

PS: yes, it was a song from the original Encantadia .. 

-NIKI

We are losing it..

Every day is a surprise. No one know what will happen tomorrow ‘till it come. People come and go. Some friends would stay and some would go away.

I am a person who’s not that easy to be with. If you want to be my friend, you have to deal with my worse version most of the time. But, if you do, I can promise you that I can stay with you as long as you want me to. It was like, if you accept me at my worst, you will surely have my best. Hindi ko mapili sa mga taong kinakaibigan ko, pero pinipili ko yung mga pinagkakatiwalaan ko.

Elementary. High Scholl. College.

My sets of close friends from Elementary to College are different. Ganito, iba ung close friends ko ng elementary, iba yung mga sa High School at iba din yung sa College. My Elementary Bffs  are my childhood friends, though we rarely see each other now, we make sure to keep in touch with each other. I really love these guys so much. My High School bffs are somehow different from my Elem Buddies but I don’t love them any less. And I miss getting along with them. It’s been a year since we last had our chitchat time. And my College Bffs. We are supposedly 5 in the Group but before our graduation, something came up and immaturity took over. There are just the three of us who remained ‘intact’. The ‘three of us’ are Me, Eunice and Julie. The three of us are good ‘till now. Or I guess??

Minsan ang friendship parang lovelife din pala. Nawawalan ng spark. *sigh

I don’t know when and how it started. We rarely talked. We don’t share secrets anymore. We even have our different sets of friends too. Their ‘brads’ and my ‘bessys’. We once talked (the three of us) and clear things out. It somehow worked naman, or so I thought. Pinipilit ko naman lumapit sa kanila eh, pinipilit kong ibalik yung date kahit alam kong iba na. May nawala na. May nasira na. There is this one time, while I was having a chitchat with one of them and the hangout chat pop-up suddenly. She immediately close it. Maybe she’s afraid I might see what’s in there, but the thing is, I saw the chat box already and it was named by the first letter of their names. Hindi ko alam kung gets nyo ba ko pero kasi, iba ung feeling. But then again, I just shrugged all the thoughts away.

What saddens me is the feeling of; we are (the three of us) close to losing it. What I mean is, the friendship we had. We are losing it. Or we already did? Hay… nothing last forever if we don’t want those things to last forever.

-Niki

Random 1.02 10/08/16

Rare times:

1. I feel genuinely happy.
2. I feel complete.
3. I feel secured.
4. I feel loved.
5. I feel needed.
6. I feel fine.
7. I feel well rested.
8. I feel important.
9. I feel fulfilled.
10. I feel … wanted.

Mostly:

1. I feel sad.
2. I am hurt.
3. I want to cry.
4. I want to go away.
5. I want to be alone.
6. I want silence.
7. I want to feel loved.
8. I want to be hug.
9. I want to feel secured.
10. I want to give in and sulk in loneliness.
11. I want to sleep so I won’t feel sad, hurt and lonely.
12. I feel the need to have someone where I can tell every single pain I am hiding.
13. I think of running away and never come back.

I wish:

1. To be happy.
2. To be love deeply.
3. To be accepted for whom I am really.
4. To have more love.
5. To be the most important person to someone.
6. I could just be me… all the time.

Someday:

1. All this pain would be ease.
2. I will be happy.. for real.
3. I can runaway and I will not hesitate anymore.
4. I will feel that I am worth to love, to cherish and to keep.
5. I will be free from hurt
6. There will be someone who will hold my hand and never let go of me no matter how hard it is to love me and no matter what the world will say.

Someday, I will not cry alone anymore. Because there will be someone who will cry with me when I am in pain. No matter how hard life can get, I will still be holding on to what the future will offer. It may not be now, but soon I know, everything will fall on their proper places and I will be happy. I will be free from pain and sadness.

Sobrang random ban g entry?? Wala feel ko lang talaga..

-Niki

Random 10/08/16

Hi!

I’ve been so lazy for the past few days ( always naman! ). Hehe. Anyway, our Team Leader is back from her Vacation Leave and we already talked. Though we are still waiting for Sir to come back for the final verdict of my mistake, I still feel somehow a little lighter. I am also on the process of moving on with my mistake. Nangyare na, wala na din naman akong magagawa kahit isipin ko pa ng isipin. Move on and be extra extra extra careful. Yan lang naman ang pwede kong gawin para hindi na maulit. I am just so thankful for having my Ninang Jazz ( I call her Ninang because she will be my Godmother someday, pag magpapakasal nako hehe..) because she never failed to give me the ‘words’ I needed when my negative thoughts attack. I really love how she comforts me everytime and how she make me realized the things that I need to understand.

So how are you doing guys? Its already October 8,2016 today. Imagine how past 2016 was, parang ilang kembot lang ang lumipas October na. Bukas makalawa,mare-realize mo nalang bigla December na pala. 2017 is just around the corner and yet my 2016 bucket list is not even half-way fulfilled! That was just so sad but, maybe I can still continue doing the others next year? Yes?  *sigh.

Lately, we attended the wedding of Eugene, ( younger brother of my bestfriend Eunice. ) It was a simple wedding, the typical province-type. Pero alam nyo ba? That wedding show me how great person Tito Allen and Tita Vicky are. They are not rich but they raise their children well and full of love. Hindi araw araw may makikilala kang katulad nila na gagawin ang lahat para siguraduhing nasa tamang daan ang mga anak nila. Tito Allen is such a great father, for me, the wedding is not for his son Eugene, rather its for Michelle. ( Eugene’s Bride). Eugene is younger than his wife but then again, that doesn’t excuse him for not marrying Michelle. Tito Allen also don’t want to just let them living-in together not getting married. His reason is simple, he have daughters too. I wonder what would dad do if he was on Tito Allen’s shoes. Anyways, our eldest sister is civilly married.

Niki..

Secret Dream..

Didnt I mention in this blog that I had this secret dream to be a writer? Iilan lang talaga ang nakaka-alam don kasi nga, secret! I had been writing stories since I was in grade six though I stopped when I enter high school. Later on college I decided to write again, and this time, hindi na sa notebook o grade 4 paper, sa wattpad na! hahaha!! I so love reading wattpad stories that's why I decided to gave writing a try. As of now, I already had 3 completed stories, 2 on-hold and 1 that is soon to be completed.

My current stories is about two people whom started because of the unintentional eavesdropping of the main character.I had been writing it for more than half a year now and I am currently writing its 38th chapter at malapit na syang matapos! Yehey!! Excited ako pero at the same time, it saddened me too for I will be bidding goodbye to the #FatedNicNiks so soon. :) Napaka habang delay na nga ng ending nila dahil kakaisip ko ng pwedeng twist na ipasok, But the main character are just too madly, deeply and crazy inlove with each other so, imagine the struggle habang pinipilut kong magalitr si Girl kay Boy kasi sobrang hirap! Napaka bait naman kasi ni Boy at sobrang love nya si Girl. And ending,walang magandang kinapupuntahan ang mga LQ nila dahil sila yung tipo na, away ngayon, bati na bukas. Ganon! Hindi naman din kasi ako ganon kagaling magsulat so, sinisimplehan ko lang din naman ang mga banat. Huhu... I will surely miss Mr. NDM and Mrs. NDM and of course, Willow a.k.a Baby Nicnik. Yesterday, I started to write the 37th chapter and it happened that this chapter is about their wedding. Sa sobrang Inlove ng mga character, masyado yatang napahaba ang wedding vows na nagawa ko. Specially the Boy's wedding vow na kaninang madaling araw ko lang natapos. Their vows are just so much to feel and I am happy for them..yiiiiih!

As much as I want to make this entry a little longer, I dont really feel good and I all I want to do is lay down to my bed and rest.

Ps: The title of the story I am talking about is Fated na may heart gawa sa less than 3. Ayan! Hanapin kung mahahanap! hahaha!<3 ako="" and="" characters.="" crush="" font="" for="" hahhaahha="" i="" imagine="" lead="" lol="" mag="" may="" my="" name="" paano="" s="" the="" used="">

Kung maka hahaha! naman ako akala mo walang problema! Eh, magtutuos na kami ni Sir bukas at wala akong kalaban laban. :( 

Dear Bes, ipag-pray mo naman na hindi ako maiyaki kasi isa sa pinaka ayaw ko ay ang napapagalitan. :(

-Niki

To whom it may concern..

And so it happened.Until now, I cant still process the things right though I am already aware on what will be the consequences of what I did. Bembang talaga ako kay Sir! 

I am really upset but I cant do anything rather than wait for tomorrow. :( . And since I am feeling stress and upset since the minute it happened and I am not eating right, sleeping right and thinking right, I got colds now.

One of the things that I hate the most is having colds because I really feel uneasy somehow. Last night I slept past 9 pm but then woke up around 1 am and been wide awake 'till 5 am! Imagine that? Nakakaloka!! Ang sakit na sa ulo bes! Hindi ako pinatahimik ng ubo ko magdamag. :(

Anyways,last night while reading a certain story on my wattpad library, I receive a text message from a random number. Random kasi hindi naman sya naka-save sa phonebook ko. Hehehe. :) I receive the text message around 12:30 midnight but I had read it I think 4-5 am in the morning because I am using my iPad and my cellphone is charging under my bed. So, the text message I receive has something to do with my last blog entry ( the one that causes my stress now ). I want to post the exact text message I receive from this random person but I think that is necessary kaya wag nalang. 

To you, who texted me last 12 midnight. I gladly appreciate what you had said and thank you. You may know me or you may not but I will be appreciating it more kung magpapakilala ka kasi, hindi kita kayang hulaan!! hahaha! Pero parang kilala mo ko kasi kung sabihin mo naman na kunyari hindi ko alam kung sino ka eh, ganun ganun nalang!! enebe?? FYI, I accidentally posted my personal number on one of my SNS account publicly. (Knowing that all the links of my SNS accounts are on the about me of my google account.) Hindi ka nag-iisa na nagte-text saakin na hindi ko kilala. As much as I want too, I cant change my personal number kasi yun yung nakalagay sa mga importanteng papeles ko! Sa office, so Ids at sa lahat lahat na. So ayun nga, kung ano man ang intensyon mo, to cheer me up yan, na-appreciate ko. Salamat. Salamat. Salamat. And uy salamat, kahit pa-paano pala ay may napapadaansa blog ko. :) 

Sa sobrang random ng entry na to, pati ako hindi natutuwa. Pero kasi... Pero kasi...

Come on guys, I need a break and this is the only thing I know para mailabas lahat to!

PS: to my random texter, hey! nagdadasal ako. Hindi ko nakakalimutan yon. Sadyang... Lamona!

-Niki

major mistake

September 20, 2016.. I really dont know what to feel after what happened. After what I did. I just had the major mistake in this lifetime. Na-gamit ko ung locked na token Bessy!!!! ang laking lost at ang laki ko ding shunga!!

I curse countless of times the whole duty. I am so stress (sa totoo lang, Depress) and I really feel stupid and I wanna cry! Naiinis ako sa sarili ko kasi, kasalanan ko talaga yon at napaka simpleng bagay lang ang kailangan gawin para maiwasan yon pero hindi ko ginawa. :( 

I dont know what to think first. Bukod sa bembang ako kay sir J, mapapagalitan pa ko sa leader namin pagbalik nya after ng kanyang leave. At paano ko sasabihin kay mama?.. I feel so disappointed on myself. Im such a failure.. I know Im so stupid. :(

ugh!!!.. I ... I am just so sad right at the moment and all I want now is a good cry. At times like this, I miss having someone to comfort me (pwera pa sa mga friends ko ). I am reffering to that someone who will say 'its okay, im here' and such. Oh well, .

wherefore art thou my future someone??

--NIKI :( 

Right time, Right Love, and the Right one

Hashtag : Happy Tummy :)  (Busog na me.. hehe..burrrp.. )Pwede nakong mag blog. 

I wanna make this confession. Hindi ko alam kung masyado lang ba akong nagde-deny sa sarili ko o ano.Well ganito kasi yon, this coming October, I will be turning 23. Hindi pa naman ako ganun katanda pero alam ko ding hindi nako ganon kabata! Like what I had said in my older posts, I am praying for this someone. As in my specific person talaga akong hinihiling kay Lord everytime I pray, hindi ko talaga nakakaligtaan banggitin iyon pero minsan nare-realize ko na, parang G na G naman akong magka-lovelife. *sigh..

Alam mo ba yung feeling na, nabibili mo lahat ng gusto mo, nakakapunta ka sa kung saan mo gustong pumunta, magandang trabaho (kahit nakakastress), tapos sobrang blessed mo sa mga taong nakapaligid sayo. Alam mo ba yon? Kasi ako oo, kasi ako yon eh. Kaya lang parang may kulang parin. L

Minsan naiisip ko, sana pala hindi nalang ako nag-move on, edi sana hindi ako atat na atat mag boyfriend ngayon! Hahaha! Chos! Pero syempre thankful naman ako na naka-move on na ako sa past major heartbreak ko. At gaya parin ng sinabi ko date, gaano ko man kagusto na alam nyo na, I still want to wait for the right time. Kung hindi pa iyon ngayon then, its fine. Though I really want it asap, I will still choose to wait for God’s perfect time. 

Me be like:  Right time, Right Love, and the Right one.

PS: myLoves,. magtweet ka naman ng madalas! hahaha

#FatedNicNiks

Thought-Ful,

Niki :)

Stressssss... #plural

Nagugutom nako pero wala pang kanin!! L

Hello! J I’ve been sa busy this past few days. Ay no! scratch that, I’ve been so busy thus past few months since I got “promoted” to the payment department. (insert deep sigh here) This so called promotion is stressing me so much! Mabuti nalang talaga at napaka tyaka ng nagtuturo atnag ga-guide saakin dahil as in super! OA na kung OA pero hindi ko talaga maenjoy ang trabaho! Jusko! Feeling ko hindi ako tatagal dahil sa araw araw na ginawang Diyos, kinukulit ko sya na sana mairaos ko ang isang araw. Grabe! L nalulungkot talaga ako pero wala akong magagawa. Kailangan kong magtrabaho dahil hindi naman kami mayaman at nag-aaral pa ang kapatid ko. L

Stress,

Nikita Mae :(

Dear Someone I am praying for..

I dont know if this is still right. To wait for you and to pray for you knowing that you are in love with someone else. 

I dont know when it really started. You were just like a random thought that cross my mind. Una talaga parang wala lang. Ni hindi nga ako na-hookagad sa charms mo though lagi na kitang nakikita since naging active ako sa mga social media accounts ko. Until one day, I saw my old self in your tweet. Hugot kung hugot eh! haha!! Since then lagi ko ng inaabangan ang mga post at tweets mo. I made sure to hit the like botton everytime you cross my newsfeed on tweeter, facebook and Instagram. 

I rarely get attracted to anyone kahit sobrang gwapo pa yan. So, consider yourself lucky dahil nasilo mo ang paningin kong choosy. hehe.. At this age of 22, turning 23 this coming October, mabibilang ko talaga sa mga daliri ko sa kamay kung ilan na nag naging crush ko simuula ng mauso ang pagkakaroon ng crush. Ewan ko ba pero totoo talaga yon. Napaka arte ko di ba? So ayun na nga.. Crush na kita. :) Ay wait! erase!. Mas tama yata yung, naging crush nakita kasi, iba na ngayon eh. Hindi na yata crush lang. But then again, let me emphasis the word "yata". hayyyy... 

1:100 lang naman ang probability na mabasa mo ito pero sana, sana talaga... mabasa ko kahit hindi mo naman din malalaman na para sayo ito unless, mag milagro ang langit at igrant ni Lord ang prayers ko. :) 

So, this one is for you..

Plain and simple, nothing special. I am living a simple life. We are living in a perfect opposite world. I grew up in a simple way having only what I need while you, I think you grew up having everything. 

As impossible as a thunder rain in the middle of the dessert in the afternoon. Thats how I describe our chances to meet each other. It feels like you we're too high to reach and too far to get close.

But Im still hoping for the most impossible thing that can happen. I am praying for you. I am wishing for the happily ever after with you and I am waiting for you. This might be the craziest thing I ever wish for but who knows??..

Dear Someone I am praying for,

Kapag hindi kayo nagwork, seryoso.. hanapin mo ko, sasagutin ko lahat ng bitter lines at hugot mo. Sasaluhin kita kahit gaano pa kabigat at kasakit yang mararamdaman mo at mamahalin kita sa paraang kaya ko..

Love,

Someone who's praying for you. :)

Ps: Pareho tayo ng letter name initials kapag walaang middle name .. NMD iba nga lang ng arrangement..

June 27, 2016 10:43pm

It should not! 101

*deep sigh*

Three years of being single is not a big deal. Well, it should not. At the moment, I can say that I am living the time of my life. A good Job, good friends, fancy clothes, gadgets and of course stronger faith. 

I am beyond happy and blessed. Aware naman ako na sobra sobra ang blessings sakin kaya hanggat maari ay sini-share ko. Lahat na yata ng mga bagay na dinasal ko at dinadasal ko, ibinigay na at binibigay ni Lord. Pero sabi nga ng isang rule sa economics, man can never be satisfied. Its was like, after having what you want, you will surely want to have more or if not, want to have something new. And I am a living proof. Yes, sobrang blessed ako na makuha lahat ng gusto ko ngayon. Sometimes, I am thinking of, ano pa nga ba ang gusto ko? Ano pa bang kulang? 

Everytime I pray, I always say thank you for everything kasi sobrang nakaka-overwhelm yung mga natatanggap ko. Siguro kasi hindi ako sanay na laging nakukuha ang gusto ko kaya ganon nalang talaga ako sobra nabibigla minsan, yung tipong today gusto ko ng bagong damit tapos kinabukasan nabili ko na yung damit, mga tipong ganon. Pero minsan, dumadating talaga ako dun sa point na, parang may kulang. Yung may gusto ako na wala pa ako.

Whenever I see an old friend na ka-age ko that already have their own family, I always feel something different. Inggit? I dont know. Its just so nakakainggit to see them caring a cute baby, having a family date and such. Minsan naiisip ko, ano kaya ang feeling? hayyyy...

Yes! I am ready to have that 'someone' in my life. Someone I can tell all my worries and angst in life, someone I can text I love yous, someone who can hold my hand, someone I can cry and laugh with, someone who can accept and love me true. That someone who will stay with me at my worse and whom I can give my best. That someone I can finally call mine... *sigh*

Just like what I had said on my previous entry, I am praying for a specific person. Ni hindi ko nga alam kung alam ba nyang nage-exist ako. Kelan ko nga lang din nalaman na inlove sya... sa iba! (sakit bhe!) Pero gaya ng sabi ko din, I dont want to rush things for I believe, right things will happen on their own perfect time and that is, in God's perfect time. And if that someone I am praying for is not the one for me, its okay. Because I know, there will be someone for me in the future. Someone who worth the wait.

Alam kong hindi ko kailangang magmadali. Hindi ko kailangang problemahin. At hindi ako dapat mainip. Mejo nakakalungkot lang at nakakainggit. I was surrounded by people who are so inlove . Lovers are all over my sight and that was just somehow frustrating. :( I admit, I dont find myself pretty. I dont even have that sexy body. Wala din ako ng tinatawag nilang appeal. PERO, I am a Degree holder. Sa ngayon yun lang naman ang meron ako. Mabait ako, hindi ako maarte, pinalaki ako ng tama ng parents ko, may tatlong side ako, si Niki na madaldal, si Niki na tahimik at si Niki na hindi ka gusto. Simpleng-simple lang talaga ako. I am living my life the way I want it to be. Hindi ko kailangang magkunwari para i-please ang ibang tao. At hindi talaga ako ligawin na tao. May pagka-judgemental din ako minsan at gusto kong i-work out ang ugali ko na yon. Dahil ako mismo naiinis don.

To that someone I am praying for, If ever you and the girl you love now will not work out, can you please... find me???.. 

尼科喜欢尼基 <3 b="">

hayyyy! so much for now. Tomorrow I'll try to post more. :) 

尼基塔美 :) 

June 27, 2016 12:24am

Rant 101

Its not that Im complaining. 'Lemme just let it out here since I cant really tell it all personally because they might be offended. I am really fond of my niece and I find here so addicting and irresistible but you know the feeling of, ugh.. I dont know how to say it! 

My new past time in the office is online shopping. Shems yes! ONLINE! ( shopee, Lazada, olx! ) Aside from bags and clothes, I also check the baby's stuffs and everything are just so adorable and I want to buy them all for my niece. Whenever my sister ask me to buy this and that for my niece, I really find it hard to say NO! I dont know why I cant say know to her when in fact we didnt grow up that close. Sabi ko nga di ba? Nung mga bubwit palang kami hanggang sa magkaisip, may kanya kanya kaming mundong apat. We all dont share the same interests in all things. Feeling ko nga sobrang opposite kaming apat. And me and my ate are just so ugh! Hindi talaga kami magkasundo. As in we always clash! And I dont know why. Basta ang alam ko, ayaw nya sakin at ako naman kasi yung taong, kung ayaw mo sakin, mas ayaw ko sayo. 

So here's the thing. Since she got married I notice that we ( kaming apat na magkakapatid) are kinda grow up some more. What I mean is, nabawasan ng very light ang pagiging immature namin. maybe because seeing ate getting married make us realize that we are not really getting any younger. (well, thats on my side, ewan ko lang sa kuya ko at sa youngest sister namin). One thing I dont like is that, I find ate so lazy to find a job. Among us four, she is the one who is more educated. Yun talaga ang pinaniniwalaan ko kahit Degree holder ako at College graduate naman sya. She was enrolled in a Catholic School ever since she started her Student journey. From Nursery-Fourth year High School. Kaming tatlo naman, ay proud product ng Elementary School at Public High School hanggang College. I am not complaining though. I love how the Public School molded me. Because I am proud that I am employed 4 days after my college graduation! haha!. Going back, as I was saying, ate dont have a job so as her husband. Her in-laws and our parents are supporting them and the needs of my niece, their daughter. ( oh I forgot, she's a two year course graduate.) 

It irritates me whenever my mom brag me and as for something like, can you buy this, buy that and that and that for my niece. I once answered her, "kung anolang yung gustong bilhin para kay baby yun lang ang bibilhin ko." Not that I dont want to help or buy nice things for my niece but, i think we are giving too much?? Kase parang nakakalimutan ng kapatid ko na responsibilidad nila yon at hindi namin. Even my Dad is so addicted to the point na hindi nya talaga matiis hindi bigyan. My younger sister even told me once that the money I gave dad for his medicines and fruits are used to buy milk and diaper for my niece! I was like, wow! Why the hell in this world this is happening??  Nakakainis lang kasi talaga minsan. Yung bakit kasi ganyan? hay ewan ko ba! Lately, while we are preparing for Bella's birthday, my tita's are teasing me to save money for my niece's coming birthday this October. first I was just shrugging off and laugh at them pero nung paulit ulit na, I told them, mag-aasawa nako! ( this mag-aasawa nako has something to do with my next entry later. :) ). Para lang matigil sila. Like, what the?? Bakit naman nila sakin sinasabi yon eh hamak na tita lang naman ako. Yeah I know, they are telling me that because I am the one who have a job. And they know that sa panahon na kailangan, pwede nila akong tawagan. Pero di ba? Ang wifi nga namin sa bahay may limit, ako pa kaya? Ayoko lang kasi na umasa sila. October is my birth month and I want to have something new this year. So If I am saving for October, its for my birthday. 

Really, I dont want you guys to think that I am complaining. I am so blessed with so much thats why I want to share it to my family. Kung kakayanin nga lang eh, gusto ko din ito ishare sa extended family ko. Hayyyyy... 

Lord, please enlighten me. :(

love, 

Niki..

June 26,2016 11:13pm

entry 101

Its been a long and tiring day for the whole family as we celebrated Bella's first birthday. It was just a simple celebration held at our humble abode. I've been longing to post an entry because the last time I post is when we we're in Baguio pa and that is last week!! Oh dear.. I really miss the place, take me back please?..

I am really excited to go back even for a two-days-one night trip again. ( yun lang yata ang kakayanin talaga ng sched ko since ayokong mag file ng leave kung hindi rin lang naman talaga kailangan.) And one more thing to consider is my ever supportive-spoiler ( as in spoiled talaga ako sa kanya ng 999.99%) Arra Cassandra Velasquez Jimenez. :) ( isang pabebe wave para sayo my loves! ) haha! Dahil wala akong boyfriend,ka-fling at ka M.U,. Its her who I fond to call, loves, babe, baby and honey. So, ayun nga. Gusto ko lang sabihing may friend ako na gaya nya mainggit na ang gustong mainggit! charot! But kidding aside, I am looking forward to go back to Baguio with her naman dahil alam kong hinding hindi nya ako bibiguin. 

To my crazy Cassey,

I so love you!! huehue.. Im looking forward to more adventures and tours and experiences with you!

Its been a week so, Im gonna post more entries tonight. Keep reading guys!

love,

Nikita Mae

June 26, 2016 10:13pm

My happy place..

Its a tiring but fulfilling day! Guess where I am?

BAGUIO CITY!!! yay! *insert happy dance*

Sa wakas! Naibsan na ang pagkasira ng summer plans ko dahil finally! Nakalanghap na ko ng malamig na simoy ng Baguio.

Last summer, I was so disappointed and sad because we are nit able to push our Bakasyon grande in Puerto Gallera because of some private matters. Our second choice is Baguio but unfortunately, it was also cancelled. ( dont wanna mention the reasons.) 

My heart is filled with so much joy at the moment. I am here lying in the soft bed of our rented condo. Actually, we are staying here at Hotel Henrico Kisad, Baguio City. It was a 5 floor condotel ( their rooms are good and well maintained. ). The unit where we are staying at the moment have two rooms, a small terrace/balcony, 1 B/T room, small kitchen and a cute living room. It was also equiped with a flat screen tv, a desk fan (though it was really not needed), an induction cooker, rice cooker and a two door refrigerator. And ow! there's a water dispenser in the kitchen too. We are just going to stay here 2 days, 1 night, meaning this night is the only night that I will lay down in this comfy bed with a soft blanket and two fluffy pillow to cuddle and that was just so, sad. 😞

Anyways, let me share my whole day adventure. 

We left our humble home in Pampanga at 3am in the morning because we planned to go to Our Lady of Manaoag Shrine for my yearly visit before heading to Baguio. We got the chance to attend the Morning Mass and light some candles. I also bought some pasalubong for my RC friends. (not all of my friends can appreciate what I bought in the Shrine because some of them belong to different religion) Here are some of what I bought.. 😊

 

I bought these Our Lady of Manaoag small statues for those people I know who will appreciate them. I mean, not all people are that religious and have a thing on things like these right? Mama Mary is just so, so wonderful that I want to share to my friends how I was so devoted to her. 

After our little picture taking sessions, we headed to Baguio City. After 1223456789 years! Finally Im backkkkk! haha! I really miss the place, the weather and of course, the feeling. I dont know why but, I always have this feeling of unexplainable happiness whenever I go here. It was like, I belong here. My heart belong here. My young soul lives here. hayyyy..

Daddy hired a tour guide for us so that we can go to our destinations without missing our way. We really did enjoy the places we visited. Baguio was just so.. wonderful and breath taking for me. We visited Botanical garden, Mines View park, Wright Park,The Mansion and Burnham park. Me and my youngest sister Bok (Kathlyn is her real name) walk around Session Road lately at around 7-9pm. We did some window shopping and pasalubong shopping in the Baguio Market too by the way. Sadly, it is not the Season of strawberries thats why we really find it hard to look for them. Meron naman kaya lang maliliit pa, yung iba nga nasisira na. Bok is a bit sad. Strawberries are her Kryptonite and all she got from the market lately are mini-mini strawberries, as in para lang masabing nakabili sya kahit papano. 

I cant say anything more, here are my pasalubong to my friends:

 

Ill try to blog again about our last day in Baguio tomorrow. For now, I'll let my self to have some decent sleep while enjoying the cold weather of the happiest place of my young heart and soul. 😍

GoodNight!

Ps: our condotel is Korean inspired. As in yung parang sa mga korea novela na condo na tirahan ng mga middle class citizens. Yung pag may tao sa labas, makikita mo sya dun sa parang intercom. 😊😆

Happy Niki 😊

June 19, 2016, 1:09 am

Hotel Henrico Kisad,

Baguio City

Benguet.

I am praying for you..

It is not a secret to you guys ( uhm, well its not if you are reading my blog since day 1 ) I am praying for that 'someone', I am praying and waiting for the right time, right things, right love and right man of course. 😍. Guilty as charge, I am one of those hindi kagandahan pero sobrang mapili. Pero sobra ba talaga?? Anyways, no-one's courting me at the moment. Hindi din naman kasi ako yung mga tipong ligawin, pag nga may nagpapalipad hangin sakin feeling ko naliligaw lang talaga sila ng landas! haha! Okay back on the topic, so as I was saying, I am praying and waiting. At the age of 20+, I still consider my self young and I shouldn't be worrying about having a boyfriend but, at somepoint I kinda feel pressure???

Again, its not a secret to you guys that I had been on a painful (ouch!) heartbreak. I invested so much feelings and all I got in the end is a broken heart. ☹️ That's way I promise myself that next time I will love someone, He will probably be my last. I dont wanna invest so much feelings and end up broken again. I wanted a more secure relationship. Yung tipong, kayang sakyan lahat moods ko na napakabilis magbago. hehe!  What I mean in 'secure' is, yung kayang panindigan na mahal ka, kayang suklian ang feelings/love (whatever they call it) na ibibigay mo, yung mahal ka nya dahil mahal ka nya hindi yung mahal ka nya kasi, sinasabi mo na mahal mo sya kaya dapat mahal ka din nya. (getching ba?) Yung taong lalaban kasama ka. Yung lagi mong ramdam na di ka mag-isa kasi,sa relatinship nyo hindi lang ikaw kasi kayong dalawa yon. hay.....

Masyado bang mahirap hanapin? Ang demanding ko ba? Ano ba kasing problema sakin??.☹️

Yes, I dont wanna rush things, sabi nga nila 'may tamang panahon para sa lahat ng bagay'. Believe me, I dont know why I feel pressured and worried at the same time. Im still young and I have all the time to enjoy my single life with my friends but deyyym, cant help it! Maybe one reason is that, I am surrounded by lovebirds! From the bus seats, foot bridge, fast food chains, facebook, IG, and twitter, lovers are everywhere! I mean, I love you here, I love you there, Yakap here, HHWW there, lambingan everywhere! My goodness! Sinong hindi mape-pressure pag buong mundo na yata ang pumi-pressure sayo??! This has been my life dillema this past few months, everytime I pray and give thanks to Lordie and St.Pio, I secretly ask them a little wish for myself. Like what I had said before, not everytime I pray, I asked something for myself. Most of the time, I pray to give thanks and wish/pray for my family, friends and to those someone I know who are in need of guidance. But since the day I realize about this so called 'dillema' I started to pray for the 'right' one.

 

Its been 1-2 months since I started to ask/wish ( tama ba ang term?..) Lordie and St. Pio. I am praying for the right one to come. (Alam mo yung feeling na G na G kana pero wala pa kasi talaga?) But still, I am willing to wait though masyado ko ng kinukulit talaga si Lord at St.Pio. Ayoko naman na sa kamamadali ko, eh, sa maling tao nanaman ako mapunta kasi nga, forever na sana ang gusto ko next time di ba? Kaya, pray-pray lang ako ng mabuti. hehe. 

Here's the real catch of this entry, I had a crush to someone. We'll I am very choosy, kahit gwapo pa yan,pag hindi ko gusto ng vibes nya, kahit sing bait yan ng lahat ng anghel sa langit, hindi ko parin gusto. But this man really got me straight to the heart. Wait, Heart?! Does it even possible to love someone who doesnt even know your existance?? Awww... my heart.... why???😭😭😭 huhuhu .. Yes, I am praying for that certain man, I am praying and waiting for answers. Answers to my prayers if he is the one I am waiting and praying for. Pero sana, sya nalang talaga.

PS: myloves,baby,babe ( that's how I address him whenever I saw him on twitter or I wanna tweet something for him, pero di ko sya minemention.) I know I am not the only one who's praying to be the one destined for you but I want you to know that, I am praying for you ☺️ , im waiting for you 😊, and my heart is ready..for you. 😍 ayiiiih. 😘 I may not know you personally and I may not know many thing about you, I am sure in one thing, I can take care of you, I can cook for you, I can laugh with you, I can cry with you, I can be crazy with you, I can love you. Just be happy with me and my heart is yours to keep. Foreves. ❤️ #FatedNM

-wishful Niki.. 😊

Good News, Bad News..

Let me start my comeback by posting this entry. J

Last time, I had posted my 2016 Bucket List. I am very positive about it and really, I am so eager  to finish those sixteen things that were listed on my bucket list.

Good News  :

Last April 25, 2016, Arra and I when to Manila Cathedral located at Intramuros for her Pilgrimage Journey (It has something to do with the Year of Mercy.). Its our first time to go there and I am proud to say that everything when fine at hindi kami naligaw. Haha! So, aside from being lucky to get there not being lost on our way, we got the chance to attend their 12 noon mass after we bought some souvenirs on their souvenir shop. ( Wish I can attach some pictures here. L ). After getting done on what should be done, I asked Arra if we can go to China Town (Binondo Manila) since malapit lang naman. To cut the story short, we went to China town and do some sightseeing since its our first time to go there. What makes our China Town side-trip worth it? We’ve got the chance to visit Binondo Church or The Minor Basilica of San Lorenzo Ruiz. We prayed inside the church and light some candles. We also bought rosaries for remembrance. I find the inside of Binondo Church cute because aside from its Beautiful Murals, it was painted by color pink! How cute was that? So there, I already started my 2016 Bucket List number 2.  Two up , 8 to go. J

Bad News :

This one has something to do with my 2016 Bucket List too. The number 3.  I think this one’s will never ever happen. I was so upset at first but after some meditation ( Meditation?! Haha!) Napag-isip isip ko, okay lang. Siguro nga tama sila na, hindi lahat ng bagay nangangailangan ng Closure. Tama na nga siguro yung, alam mo sa sarili mo na naka-move on kana at okay kana. Self-Closure kung baga. Tama na siguro yung sinubukan ko na magkaroon kami ng closure. I did all my part and that’s what matters to me. Masaya nako don. J So, for me, Bucket List Entry number 3 is a now marked as check (done).

It did not happened the way I want it to be but its fine. Atleast I tried. J

PS: Don’t talk like, as if I’m still hoping for the two of us to work out. Don’t act like as if ikaw lang ang naka-move on. At oo, galit ako ngayon at alam ko din na sasabihin mong naiintindihan mo ko kahit sa totoo lang, hindi.

-Niki  J

Im backkkkkkk

Boo!

Hello there!!. Finally! ‘Emm baccckkkkkkk!!

It been a long time at ngayon lang ako makakapag blog dahil ngayon lang din naman ako nakapag bakasyon ng ganito. As in! Ang dami-dami kong gustong ipost dati pa pero alam nyo un? Yung feeling na natambak na at nakalimutan na nga ang iba. *sigh*

Saan ba ko mag-uumpisa?

-Nikita, Bakasyonista Version :)

You'll be miss forevs!..

'Love, I see forever in your eyes.. I can see heaven in your smile.. And when I hold you close, I dont want to let go because deep in my soul I know girl, that you are the only light I see.. Your love means everything to me.. '

I miss the way we sang this song together. I miss the laughters we always share with each other. I miss the way you hug me. 'Miss the way you kiss my temple whenever I cry and you will say, 'Okay lang yan!'. I miss the way you cheer me when I feel down and sad. I miss.... I miss the way you say ' loveyou! '. I miss... .. .. I miss you..

All of a sudden, I'm feeling nostalgic. While I am listening to our favorite songs I suddenly wanna go back to the days where you will sit beside me and we will listen to our favorite playlist together. I will lean my head on your shoulder then you will lean yours on my head. And when I started to sing the song we are listening, you will cover my mouth and say, 'ako nalang ang sasabay sa kanta. Nasisira eh.'. Then you will laugh. You're laugh that I miss the most. Yung tawa na kasama pati mata.

I can still remember one time when you asked me to sing "I Do" because you told me its one of your favorite song and you want to dedicate it to me. But I refused and I said 'pangit yan. Ayoko.' You didn't asked why but I know deep inside your wondering that's why I told you my reason. And I swear, your reaction was epic! As in E-P-I-C! I was half-shocked when you said, (excuse the word) " P*tangina pati yon?!' Its not as if its the first time I heared you curse that's why I felt a bit shocked but, its because of your facial expression and the tone of your voice. High pitch eh? XD

hay... (*insert deep sigh here) 'Emma really missing you and I don't know why. I wish we could still bump into each other in the street, but I perfectly know that we couldn't.

How I wish to meet someone like you where I can share my new favorite songs, someone like you who will sing and listen to a certain song with me until I got tired of it and play another song. Someone whom I can lean my head on his shoulder. Someone who will sing me my favorite songs, (our 98 degrees favorite songs.) and someone, who always see the good things in me when everyone only see the bad. But yeah I know! Waiting to meet someone like you is like waiting for a falling star to pass by in a starless-cloudy-night sky.

As much as I want to see you, talk to you, lean my head on your shoulder, listen to 98 degrees's songs like we used to do, eat chocolate and ice cream in your car, play Farmville 2 on our own Ipads', read the stories I wrote in wattpad together and cook 'kung ano ang maisip'' together, I know. It will never happen again.

And because I miss you, lemme sing for you. (hehehe) this time, hindi kana makakareklamo na hindi kagandahan ang boses ko dahil hindi mo naman na maririnig. Ni hindi mo nga mababasa ang ita-type kong lyrics kahit pa gustuhin ko pang basahin mo. :) 

We do almost everything that lovers do,

And that's why its hard, just to be friends with you..

Every time your heart is broken by the fool,..

I want you to know, that it hurts me too..

Its hard to wipe your tears away..

knowing that you should be with me..

Now tell me why??..

Why are we still friends?

when everything says..

We should be more than we are..

And tell me why?.. Every time I find,

Someone that I like..

We always end up just being... Friends..

So, did you like it? I am singing it inside my head while I do the typing of its lyrics. :) I can almost see your brows frowning my dear.

Its one of our favorite song, do you still remember? :)

'Gone crazy with our memories now because I'm missing you so bad. And it makes me sad. I've been wanting to hear your voice singing "On this day" since this morning. I miss the way you glance at me while you sang the song. You even asked me once if I wanted it to be my wedding song and I told you I don't because I want it to be, "Forevermore" by Side A. You told me, 'gasgas na yun eh, gamit na gamit na.' and I answered you 'hindi naman ikaw ang pakakasalan ko kaya wag kang anu dyan!' then you answered me, 'ako pa ba? ah basta!'.

It was like, it's just yesterday. It was yesterday when you left without a single word and that hurts but I understand. You left not because you want to, it's because you have to. Only a few people (related to me) got the chance to meet you and see you in person. Even my close friends only knew your existence through my stories about you. Sabi mo pa nga, siguro natatakot akong makita ka nila kasi baka magwapuhan sila sayo at ligawan ka. It's not just once that you ask me to introduce you to my best friends but I always refuse. I either don't know my reason why I don't want them to see you. Swear!

It's one of the things that I regret. Sana nakilala ka nila. Sana nakita ka din nila. I hope they saw how amazing person you are.

:( I miss you.. And I am glad that we've got the chance to create too many memories I can always look back whenever I miss you. Memories that I will always remember whenever I listen to our favorite 98 degrees band songs. Memories that are for keeps forevs.. :)

Love, I see forever in your eyes

I can see heaven in your smile

And when I hold you close

I don't want to let go

Because deep in my soul I know girl

That you are the only light I see

Your love means everything to me

I promise that we'll never part

'Cause you'll always be near, here in my heart

If the sun, should refuse to rise

And the moon, doesn't hang in the night

The tides won't change, seasons rearrange

When the world is through

I will still love you

Girl, you're like an angel from above

Sent here to shower me with your love

Hold me beneath your wings

Tell me all of the things

All the hopes and the dreams we can share

'Cause I'll be your shelter from the storm

I'll be the fire that keeps you warm

I'll be your light in the dark

Cause you'll always be near, here in my heart

If the sun, should refuse to rise

And the moon, doesn't hang in the night

The tides won't change, seasons rearrange

When the world is through

I will still love you

If anything could last forever

It's what I feel for you

Oh baby, you touch my heart in ways

That words could never say

That's why I'll always love you

If the sun, should refuse to rise

And the moon, doesn't hang in the night

The tides won't change, seasons rearrange

When the world is through

I will still love you..

Love,

Niki :)